Your Kids Need to See You Uncomfortable

We all know the saying: monkey see, monkey do. And when it comes to parenting, nothing could be truer. Our children are watching. Constantly. Not just listening to what we say, but absorbing how we live. And when it comes to wellbeing, that’s either a gift or a ticking time bomb.

Right now, we’re in a culture that talks a big game about resilience, balance, and mental health. Schools are running brilliant outdoor ed programs, wellness is a billion-dollar industry, and there are podcasts galore about slowing down and being mindful. But here’s the question: are we actually doing it? More importantly: are our kids seeing us do it? Nature as a luxury or a necessity? Too often, self-care has become synonymous with a massage, a bubble bath, or a glass of wine. Lovely? Yes. Transformative? Probably not.

If we want to raise a generation that genuinely values wellbeing, we need to model something different. Something real. Something a little more uncomfortable, like hiking boots instead of slippers, a backpack instead of a bathrobe, and a campfire chat instead of Netflix on the couch. And yes, we get it, adults are busy. We’re working full-time, raising kids, managing side projects, looking after aging parents, and trying to stay sane through it all. But that’s exactly why it matters. Because our kids aren’t just learning how to cope from us, they’re learning how to live.

Getting trapped in comfort

Here’s the hard truth I’ve seen through both my research and my experience running adventure-based wellbeing programs: if we don’t show our kids what it means to get outdoors and get uncomfortable, they won’t learn it on their own. No matter how good the school camps are, they’ll never replace the impact of seeing a parent model getting muddy, sweaty, or rained on, and still smiling. Still showing up. Still breathing it in.

Right now, our kids are growing up in a world that’s only getting faster, louder, and more disconnected from the natural world. Burnout isn’t waiting for midlife anymore, it’s starting in the teenage years. And unless we shift the system by shifting ourselves, we’re handing them the same cycle we’re trying to escape from.

We don’t need to be perfect, just present

This isn’t about becoming a wilderness warrior or scaling a mountain every weekend. It’s about presence. Purpose. Showing that nature isn’t a luxury escape, but a regular tool for grounding, growth, and perspective. It’s about making time, no matter how small, to step outside with our kids or on our own and let them see that discomfort is not something to avoid, but something to grow through. Because if we want them to build a life of connection, meaning, and resilience, we have to live it ourselves, not just talk about it.

So what now? Start small. Go on that overnight hike. Say yes to a weekend outside. Get a little cold, a little sweaty, a little out of your head and into the wild. They’re watching. And if monkey see, monkey do… then let’s give them something worth copying.

Ready to model a bit of discomfort and create some awesome memories with your teen? Come along to our French Island Parent & Teen overnight hike and discover the connecting power of nature. Check it out HERE.